Teaching Tough Kids
Chapter 6
Ideas to enrich social and emotional connections
Inside Tough Kids with Asperger syndrome
Overview; Asperger syndrome
Guiding principles to create emotionally sustaining opportunities
Raising acceptance and happiness
- Belonging
- Direct, positive feedback
- Case study, that's normal?
- The need for heroes and role models
- Mentorship
- Build a team
- Unify attitudes
- A mood diary
Eating anxiety and stress
- Visual strategies
- Strengthening social skills
- Formal social skills programs
- Rules for keeping friends
- Rules for making friends
- Informal social skills practice
- Social stories
Playful ideas to strengthen social and emotional muscle
- Reading voice, body and face
- Watching behaviour
- Play detective
- Literal versus illusive
- Compliments
- Saying sorry
- Empathy
- Obsessions and collections
- The smart average
- Write yourself onto a list
- PowerPoint
- Teach how to think flexibly
- Review, review, review and celebrate wins!
Transitional strategies
- Six months before starting at a new school
- Several months before starting at a new school
- Preparation for new events
- Day-to-day transitions
The trouble with choice and ambiguity
- Homework
- An alternate lunch time
Restoration: down time and break cards
Conclusion: influencing change requires planning, commitment and teamwork
Chapter sample
Dylan, like many of my clients, has Asperger syndrome. This chapter is inspired
by the deep admiration I have for the courage he shows. Can you imagine having
to interact in a socially and emotionally rich world, yet consistently finding
it difficult to interpret your own feelings and understand the feelings of others?
This is what confronts Dylan and others with Asperger syndrome as they do their
best to find happiness and success every day.

I can't really tell you when I got it or how Asperger syndrome
feels because it's the way I am. If I had to say one thing about it I'd
say it's confusing, but I couldn't have told you that when I was
younger. No one can see Asperger syndrome and that's part of the problem.
In some ways I'm the same as anyone else, but in other ways I know it
makes me different. In class when the teacher writes page 57 on the board everyone
else seems to know what to do. For me it's not obvious. Once I stop worrying
and work it out everyone else has almost finished and that's so annoying.
I suppose I've had to learn another language, your language. The language
I do understand is computers. They don't fight me, they're not mean
to me, they do exactly what I tell them to do and they are organised the way
my brain is. They are almost like a best friend to people with Asperger syndrome
and that's why I like them so much.

Dylan, 14 years
Guiding principles to create emotionally sustaining opportunities
In this chapter you will find an assortment of ideas teachers, school support
officers, school counsellors and psychologists can use to build socially and
emotionally nourishing opportunities for all kids who experience communication
delays and differences. The primary focus, of course, is for students identified
with Asperger syndrome. For them, not being able to flexibly interpret the social
world triggers emotion and behaviour that is tricky to manage.
Realistically, how much scope is there for us to raise the happiness and emotional
connectivity of children at school? The short answer is that providing we have
the will, educators can contrive countless opportunities to generate optimistic
relationships and situations for young people (Lord and McGee, 2001). Our collective
wisdom and care is potent! Yes, it may be more challenging to influence transformations
in children with core processing differences, and it is likely more testing
to influence constructive change as they become older, but we are a significant
group who understand the kinds of structures and messages these kids need to
receive...
The book, "Teaching Tough Kids", is now out of stock and no longer available.